Deeper Relationships
I alluded to my heart with my last NEST posting about deeper
relationships.
A few days ago I received a word. The third word in a week. (Those that
know me know I am not "looking" for words, they just seem to find me.)
It was a relatively difficult word for me. It had to do with things
that I had done and other things I had not done. Kind of like Paul's
dissertation in Romans. It was not just about being in sin but doing
good things with good being the enemy of God. My "sin" was not blatant
nor would most people have noticed it. It was about doing things the
Lord had not called me to do and not doing what He had called me to do.
I am struggling. I am fortunate that I have built some strong
relationships over the years and I was able to call upon a few of them
yesterday and today.
Why are relationships so important? I think Jesus summed it up when He
said to "love the Lord with all your heart and to love your neighbor."
So often I encounter people who are really great in their relationship
with the Lord but not "so hot" with their neighbors. Others float
around from relationship to relationship not really engaging the Lord.
And few find the "balance" in life. But it is said "that they will know
we are Christians by our love," so how do we do that?
I can only believe we can do it by approaching it from a biblical
perspective and the willingness to build relationships. I took an
online test this morning. Part of it revealed that people who do not
have solid relationships (That is plural!) add "extra" years to their
chronological age, meaning that without real relationships a person of
50 years old, is actually "55" or so because of the stress and lack of
solid relationships. And that actually is a potential risk for removing
real years from one's life.
The biblical perspective is that we love one another. Not a love that
sees one another on Sunday only (Let's be real, greeting one another
while the pastor shifts from music to preaching does not build
relationships.) and has no connection during the week and believes
that's relationship that you will turn to when your life goes sour. A
gathering where people worship and pray and break bread. And build
relationships by making commitments. And that word commitment is
important. I think if you checked with some of my friends you would
find that I call pretty regularly. The other day I received a call from
a friend of many years. Out of the clear blue sky. This is someone is
very unlikely to call me though I call them pretty regularly. And it
was extremely welcome.
God created us for relationship-designed us to link with one another.
And if we feel strongly about our connection to the Lord then we ought
to feel as strongly about our relationship to one another. God is love
and we manifest that when we love one another, releasing the kingdom of
God.
How do we do this?
First we must become aware that it is important to God, to our future
and to our own spirituality. Then we must commit to it. We do not need
nor can we maintain dozens of relationships on this level, but we must
develop and maintain a few. These are relationships that in my life, I
plan to last for life, either theirs or mine. And then we must devote
time to it. It all works out to a little acronym I discovered called
A(ware) C(ommit) T(ime).
And all of this needs a place to begin. And that is my next thinking
process. I will be working on this.
What do I think this will look like? What happens when we come together
to relate with one another? One of the key things about being in
relationship is trust. I have to trust before I reveal my inner
secrets. Now I know there is a lot of teaching that we should be "dead"
to one's self and we can tell each other anything and care little about
what people think. On the other hand for me to be in the place of
"confessing" my sin so that I might be healed, there needs to be some
degree of "safety." Having said that, relationships are built by
commitment to others. The Bible tells us to esteem others higher than
ourselves. It also tells us to believe the best of one another. Now if
we just go out and set "rules" in motion we easily end up with
religiosity and no one wants that. Me, I am looking for revelation with
encounter. I am not looking for another meeting.
Many have been in touch with me who need more relationship. Many want
to worship. Many want to gather. Many want the safety and the
encouragement of gathering. Only last week I received word that I was
to gather again. I confess that as I review what comes out of this, I
have some fear and trepidation. I also recognize that this is unfounded
in some respects. What do I do with this? I think about adults and then
I think about children and those that have them. That places greater
requirements on these thoughts. I have thought about the lack of
gifting I have in so many areas. I think most of us are not looking to
be taught, as we have more than enough knowledge, but we are looking
for a place to worship and share our gifts. The other dynamic is that
we want these gifts to be used to promote His Kingdom. That means
connecting with the world. How many of you have said I would be more
bold, more evangelistic...if I had a safe place to "put" them.
It all comes down to building relationship. How many of you would want
to be "part" of something that is relationship building? I would like
to hear from you. Many of us go through the motions of going to church
or don't even go regularly because we don't want something dry. This is
not about being a Bible study, or hearing a good word. THere are times
and seasons for that. This about building relationships so that we can
see unity come. I am not naive about the costs of time, nor of the
uphill battle this would be. But if relationship is high on God's
priorities, then it ought to be on ours. And when something is
priority, it moves to the top of the list. This is not about stopping
the sin or saving the world, but it might be. Why? Because if we
destroy the root of those things that hurt us and keep us held back,
then the rest of the fruit of that tree will go. I am always more
likely not to sin, when I feel good about myself, or I feel productive,
or I feel His presence. And I am most likely to sin when I do not feel
encouraged, or hurt or that I am not seeing His Kingdom come.
So, what do you think? Isn't it time we got serious about the Kingdom
of God and began to build relationships? And let go of the hurt and the
pains of broken ones? Isn't it time to apply the rules of the Kingdom
here in our town and our area?
Let me know what you think!
